Why Fighting Your Thoughts Doesn’t Always Work
Most people decide to enter addiction treatment because they want to finally break free from the chains of their substance use. They start to desire less anxiety, fewer negative results of substance use, more confidence, better relationships, or a sense of personal freedom. So, they might enter treatment thinking the goal is to remove uncomfortable emotions. But that’s not the reality. The problem is that the harder we fight against certain thoughts and feelings, the stronger they often become, which tends to create a higher potential for relapse. When you’re told not to think of a purple turtle, what do you tend to do? You think of a purple turtle. This is where Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) offers a different perspective.
Instead of teaching our clients how to get rid of difficult thoughts and emotions, Centered Recovery Programs incorporates ACT principles to help clients develop a healthier relationship with these thoughts and emotions while continuing to move toward navigating addiction, mental health challenges, and life’s inevitable discomforts in a healthier way.
What Is Acceptance and Commitment Therapy?
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, commonly known as ACT, is a therapeutic approach that helps individuals build psychological flexibility. Basically, it is the ability to stay present, make room for difficult experiences, and continue taking meaningful action aligned with your values. Developed by psychologist Steven Hayes, ACT is based on the understanding that emotional pain is a normal part of being human. ACT teaches people how to respond to discomfort rather than spending energy trying to eliminate it. Let’s face it – that would be a neverending feat.
This does not mean accepting harmful situations or giving up on personal growth. Instead, it means learning to stop fighting internal experiences that cannot always be controlled and redirecting that energy toward building a meaningful life. One of the most common phrases in ACT is: “You can have the thought and still not take the action.” This simple concept becomes incredibly powerful in recovery and mental health treatment.
The Problem With Avoidance
Human beings naturally move toward pleasure and away from pain. When we feel anxious, lonely, ashamed, overwhelmed, or emotionally exhausted, we often look for ways to escape those feelings. Sometimes that escape looks like alcohol or substance use. Other times it may look like isolation, overworking, excessive scrolling, perfectionism, people-pleasing, or avoiding difficult conversations. While these strategies may provide temporary relief, they often create larger problems over time.
ACT refers to this pattern as experiential avoidance—the attempt to avoid, suppress, or control uncomfortable internal experiences. The goal of ACT is not to eliminate pain. The goal is to help people develop the capacity to experience discomfort without allowing it to dictate their behavior.
The Neuroscience Behind ACT
Our brains are designed for survival, not happiness.
The human brain evolved to identify threats, predict danger, and keep us safe. This means our minds are constantly scanning for problems, replaying mistakes, and imagining worst-case scenarios. While this system helped our ancestors survive, it can create significant distress in modern life.
For individuals struggling with addiction, anxiety, depression, or trauma, the brain often learns that certain behaviors provide immediate relief from emotional discomfort. Over time, these patterns become deeply reinforced. The challenge is that relief and recovery are not always the same thing.
ACT helps individuals create space between an internal experience and a behavioral response. Through repeated practice, clients learn they can experience a craving without acting on it. They can feel anxiety without avoiding the situation. They can experience self-doubt without abandoning their goals. This process strengthens new neural pathways and supports the brain’s natural capacity for change, known as neuroplasticity.
*Image Credit: Thrive Training & Consulting.
The Core Principles of ACT
At its heart, ACT teaches six interconnected skills that help individuals develop greater psychological flexibility.
The first is acceptance, which involves making room for difficult thoughts, emotions, and sensations rather than constantly fighting against them.
The second is cognitive defusion. Instead of treating every thought as truth, individuals learn to step back and observe their thoughts for what they are: mental events, not necessarily facts. A thought such as “I’m a failure” becomes “I’m having the thought that I’m a failure.”
ACT also emphasizes mindfulness and present-moment awareness. Rather than becoming trapped in regrets about the past or worries about the future, individuals learn to connect with what is happening right now.
Another important concept is self-as-context, which encourages people to recognize that they are more than their thoughts, emotions, addiction, or diagnosis. A person may experience anxiety, but they are not anxiety. A person may struggle with addiction, but addiction is not their identity.
Finally, ACT helps individuals clarify their values and take committed action toward them. Values act as a compass, helping guide decisions even when circumstances are difficult.
ACT and Addiction Recovery
ACT has become increasingly valuable in addiction treatment because it directly addresses one of the most common drivers of substance use: the desire to escape discomfort. Many individuals do not use substances simply because they enjoy them. They use them because substances temporarily relieve anxiety, loneliness, shame, grief, stress, trauma symptoms, or emotional pain.
The challenge is that recovery inevitably involves discomfort. You may experience cravings, difficult emotions that were previously numbed, relationship challenges, uncertainty, or fear. ACT teaches clients that discomfort is not necessarily a sign that something is wrong. Often, discomfort is a natural part of growth.
Rather than asking, “How do I make this feeling go away?” ACT encourages a different question: “How do I move toward the life I want while this feeling is here?” That shift can be transformative in recovery.
What ACT Looks Like in Real Life
Imagine a person in early recovery who finds themselves thinking, “I’ll never be able to stay sober.”
Many approaches might focus on arguing with that thought or trying to replace it with something more positive. ACT takes a different approach.
Instead of debating the thought, the individual learns to notice it: “I’m having the thought that I’ll never be able to stay sober.”
The thought may still be present, but it no longer has to determine what happens next.
The person can then ask themselves: “What action would move me toward recovery right now?”
Perhaps that action is calling a sponsor, attending a meeting, reaching out to a therapist, or simply making it through the next hour without using. The goal is not to eliminate every difficult thought. The goal is to keep moving toward what matters despite them.
How ACT Aligns With Centered’s Philosophy
At Centered Recovery Programs, we believe recovery is about more than abstinence. It is about helping individuals build lives that feel meaningful, connected, and aligned with their values. ACT supports this philosophy by encouraging self-awareness rather than self-judgment, willingness rather than avoidance, and purposeful action rather than perfection.
We recognize that clients do not need to be free from fear, anxiety, cravings, or uncertainty before they begin making positive changes. They simply need the tools and support to move forward alongside those experiences. By helping clients clarify what matters most and develop healthier ways of responding to discomfort, ACT provides a practical framework for long-term recovery and emotional wellness.
Recovery Is Not About Waiting to Feel Ready
One of the most empowering lessons ACT teaches is that you do not have to wait until you feel motivated, confident, or certain before taking action.
You can feel anxious and still attend therapy.
You can experience cravings and still choose recovery.
You can doubt yourself and still move toward your goals.
At Centered Recovery Programs, we help clients develop the skills to navigate difficult thoughts and emotions while continuing to build lives that reflect what matters most to them. Because recovery is not about eliminating discomfort—it is about learning how to live meaningfully in its presence.
Author: Jennifer Lopes, MS CMHC Intern
Medical Reviewer: Krista Smith, MS Psy, and CEO of Centered
